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meteor (poetry)
"i'm not having anyone talk about me in the past tense!"
somewhere west of esthar --
carrying her (limp) along decrepit railroad tracks
toward the horizon and the end of the world...
somewhere between her last trial and his
-- he realized it was all his fault.
they'd shared a shooting star.
she smiled, watching it, shining,
and suddenly his nightmare of public glory
didn't seem so bad.
he'd walked to her blaze and been warmed
silent as he told himself: live hard die young
better to do than start dying]
now, slow, cold and alone...
he realizes a mass of ice
plummeting to burn in the unforgiving atmosphere
destroys more than itself
as it falls.
Here's where I admit this was fanfic -- yes, that bit at the top is indeed a quote -- but I'd like to hear from anyone who may stumble across this who isn't a FFVIII aficionado: is it OK without knowledge of the game? Cause that was kinda the goal here. Planning on posting this to fanfiction.net, whenever I get the motivation to actually format it to do so...
The other question torturing me here is: "comet" might be more accurate than "meteor", but I think the latter sounds better. :/ I wanted to make the first line "south" instead of "west", cause I thought that sounded better too, but on that I went with faith to canon rather than poetic license. I dunno -- let me know.
somewhere west of esthar --
carrying her (limp) along decrepit railroad tracks
toward the horizon and the end of the world...
somewhere between her last trial and his
-- he realized it was all his fault.
they'd shared a shooting star.
she smiled, watching it, shining,
and suddenly his nightmare of public glory
didn't seem so bad.
he'd walked to her blaze and been warmed
silent as he told himself: live hard die young
better to do than start dying]
now, slow, cold and alone...
he realizes a mass of ice
plummeting to burn in the unforgiving atmosphere
destroys more than itself
as it falls.
Here's where I admit this was fanfic -- yes, that bit at the top is indeed a quote -- but I'd like to hear from anyone who may stumble across this who isn't a FFVIII aficionado: is it OK without knowledge of the game? Cause that was kinda the goal here. Planning on posting this to fanfiction.net, whenever I get the motivation to actually format it to do so...
The other question torturing me here is: "comet" might be more accurate than "meteor", but I think the latter sounds better. :/ I wanted to make the first line "south" instead of "west", cause I thought that sounded better too, but on that I went with faith to canon rather than poetic license. I dunno -- let me know.
no subject
being a non-FFVIII aficionado myself, i think that it works fine. granted, i have a small (very small) idea of the plot. but still, i think that i am getting the point here. i'm guessing he(?) is walking along carrying her (possibly, probably dead) and thinking about everything they shared and blaming himself. that seems to be the gist of it. although i'm not sure about the brackett ] after the word dying. is that a typo or am i missing something? ^_^
(PS- Glad you're back and I hope your cold is doing better!)